Surviving Summer with Your College Student

As a mom to one daughter who lived in the dorms during college and another who lived at home, I think I have a reasonably balanced perspective on the joys and pitfalls of both.

I missed the daily, routine interaction with my oldest, but had to navigate the at times very turbulent waters of being a mom to a “sometimes” adult. I sometimes say, because my daughter was all about being an independent woman until dinner rolled around and she wanted to know what I was making, or, going out for a dinner but suddenly being a kid again when the check came.

If your college student is coming or already home for summer, June to September can be fraught with peril, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Use these strategies to keep summer as light and carefree as you dream it can be.

Take a Breath Stop for a minute and think of some of the attitudes and styles you embraced when you were in college. Once you stop shaking your head and or giggling at your temporary insanity, remember your college student is in the midst of their search for their identity. Your child may come home and announce they’re vegan, switching religions, walking away from their faith, changing majors, or dropping out of school. The key is to remember that not all of these changes will stick. Some will – tattoos, like diamonds, last forever – but for the most part, they’ll move through many ideologies, philosophies, and relationships, so it’s pointless to get hung up on any of them. Show interest, but keep careful of asking too many questions, sharing your opinions, or passing judgment. It’s important to think of the relationship regarding where you want to be in five years. Is a lousy tattoo worth damaging your relationship with your child?

Time is Relative

Remember, your child has been away and enjoying their independence, perhaps for the first time. Often one of the biggest challenges between college students and parents is the issue of day-to-day scheduling. Because they’ve been on their own, sometimes college students need to remember how their behavior impacts others. The best way to curtail this conflict is by sitting down and having a face to face conversation about your expectations on everything from chores, meals, work schedules, sleeping in, and sharing vehicles. There’s a distinct shift in the family dynamic, and the sooner everyone acknowledges it, the easier it will be for everyone.

Jobs vs. Internships

Many students will find summer jobs to help with their expenses over the summer, and tuition or costs in the Fall. However, some students will instead have an internship, often unpaid, that will help them secure employment after graduation. There are paid internships out there, but even those generally pay very little. As parents, it’s important to remember that the lack of pay should never be confused with a lack of value. Internships offer students the opportunity to talk to adults currently working in their field of interest and allow them hands-on experience. There are miles between classroom training and fieldwork, and that experience can be life-changing.

It’s a Balancing Act

It’s important to remember that your student is probably just as anxious or annoyed about what’s happening as you are. Open and honest conversations, respect for one another’s feelings and privacy, and the freedom to both express yourself and forgive are key.

Summer break is temporary – family is forever.

Tracey Dowdy is a freelance writer based just outside Washington DC. After years working for non-profits and charities, she now freelances, edits and researches on subjects ranging from family and education to history and trends in technology. Follow Tracey on Twitter.

Comments:

  1. I’m not that much of a internet reader to be honest but your sites really nice, keep
    it up! I’ll go ahead and bookmark your website to come back later on. Many thanks

  2. Nice post. I was checking continuously this blog and I am impressed!
    Extremely useful info particularly the last part 🙂 I care for such info much.
    I was looking for this particular information for a very long
    time. Thank you and best of luck.

  3. Hi! I’m at work browsing your blog from my new iphone!
    Just wanted to say I love reading through your blog
    and look forward to all your posts! Carry on the superb work!

  4. Hey would you mind letting me know which hosting
    company you’re working with? I’ve loaded your blog in 3 completely different internet browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot faster then most.
    Can you recommend a good web hosting provider at a honest
    price? Thank you, I appreciate it!

  5. Hi i am kavin, its my first time to commenting anywhere, when i
    read this post i thought i could also make comment due to this sensible piece of writing.

  6. Hello there! This post couldn’t be written much better!

    Looking through this article reminds me of my previous roommate!

    He continually kept preaching about this. I most certainly will forward this article to him.
    Fairly certain he will have a very good read. Thank you for sharing!

  7. My brother suggested I might like this website.
    He was once totally right. This post actually made my
    day. You cann’t imagine just how a lot time I had spent for this info!
    Thanks!

  8. Great post however I was wondering if you could write
    a litte more on this subject? I’d be very thankful if you could elaborate a little
    bit more. Many thanks!

  9. We are a gaggle of volunteers and opening a brand new scheme
    in our community. Your site provided us with useful info to work on.
    You have performed a formidable activity and our whole neighborhood can be grateful to you.

  10. Usually I do not read post on blogs, however I wish to say that this write-up very forced me to take a look at and do it!
    Your writing taste has been surprised me. Thanks, quite nice article.

  11. Link exchange is nothing else except it is simply
    placing the other person’s web site link on your page at
    suitable place and other person will also do similar in support of you.

  12. Greetings from California! I’m bored to death at work so I decided to browse your website on my iphone
    during lunch break. I enjoy the info you provide here and
    can’t wait to take a look when I get home. I’m shocked at how quick your blog loaded on my cell
    phone .. I’m not even using WIFI, just 3G .. Anyhow, great site!

  13. Hi, I do believe this is a great web site. I stumbledupon it 😉 I am going to revisit yet again since i
    have saved as a favorite it. Money and freedom is the
    best way to change, may you be rich and continue to guide other people.

  14. You actually make it appear so easy with your presentation however I in finding
    this topic to be really one thing that I think I
    might by no means understand. It seems too complicated and very huge for me.
    I’m having a look ahead to your next submit, I’ll try
    to get the grasp of it!

  15. Its like you read my mind! You seem to know so
    much about this, like you wrote the book in it or something.
    I think that you could do with a few pics to drive the message home a little bit,
    but other than that, this is magnificent blog.
    A great read. I’ll definitely be back.

  16. Definitely believe that which you stated. Your favorite justification seemed to
    be on the net the simplest thing to be aware of. I say to you, I definitely get annoyed while
    people consider worries that they plainly don’t know about.
    You managed to hit the nail upon the top as well as defined out the whole thing without having
    side effect , people can take a signal. Will probably be back to
    get more. Thanks

  17. I like the helpful information you provide to your articles.

    I will bookmark your blog and check once more right here regularly.
    I’m quite sure I will be informed plenty of
    new stuff proper here! Good luck for the following!

  18. I have read so many content regarding the blogger lovers however this piece of writing is genuinely
    a fastidious paragraph, keep it up.

  19. Vajinal Kuruluk ve Tedavisi. Biz kadınlar, menopoz
    öncesinde veya menopoz sırasında ateş basmaları ya da gece terlemesi gibi şikayetlerimiz hakkında çekinmeden konuşabiliriz.
    Fakat, konu vajinal kuruluk olunca menopoz sürecinin çok doğal
    bir etkisi olmasına rağmen en yakınlarımıza dahi bu konuda söz etmekten çekiniriz.

  20. When I entered the university, I did not know how I could complete all the tasks in many subjects. I am glad that I decided to go here and found out about the service that helps students in such situations. Now I have time to do everything that the teachers ask us.

  21. Hello there! I could have sworn I’ve been to
    this website before but after browsing through many of the posts I realized it’s new to me.
    Nonetheless, I’m definitely happy I found it and I’ll be bookmarking it and checking back
    regularly!

  22. The workload at the university is sometimes colossal. And it is very difficult to find free time for friends or hobbies. Writing a descriptive essay was especially difficult for me. That’s why I came here https://www.ozessay.com.au/blog/how-to-write-a-descriptive-essay to learn more about completing this assignment. This information has been helpful to me and I can quickly write a descriptive essay.

  23. Hi are using WordPress for your blog platform? I’m
    new to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and set up
    my own. Do you need any html coding knowledge to make your own blog?
    Any help would be really appreciated!

  24. Wonderful beat ! I would like to apprentice while you amend your site,
    how could i subscribe for a blog web site? The account helped me a acceptable deal.
    I had been a little bit acquainted of this your broadcast offered bright clear idea

  25. Magnificent goods from you, man. I have understand your stuff previous to and you are just too great.

    I actually like what you have acquired here, certainly
    like what you’re saying and the way in which you say it.
    You make it entertaining and you still care for to keep it smart.
    I can’t wait to read far more from you. This is actually a great site.

  26. Ahaa, its pleasant conversation on the topic of this post at
    this place at this website, I have read all that, so at this time me also commenting here.

  27. Have you ever considered writing an ebook or guest authoring on other
    blogs? I have a blog centered on the same topics you discuss and would really like to have you share some stories/information. I know my subscribers would
    enjoy your work. If you are even remotely interested,
    feel free to shoot me an e mail.

  28. My partner and I stumbled over here coming from a different web page and
    thought I might as well check things out. I like what I see so now i’m following you.
    Look forward to checking out your web page again.

  29. This design is spectacular! You definitely know how to keep a
    reader entertained. Between your wit and your videos,
    I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost…HaHa!) Excellent job.

    I really enjoyed what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it.
    Too cool!

  30. I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme.

    Did you create this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it for you?
    Plz answer back as I’m looking to construct my own blog and would like to find out where u got this from.
    thank you

  31. When I originally commented I clicked the “Notify me when new comments are added” checkbox and
    now each time a comment is added I get three emails with the same comment.
    Is there any way you can remove people from that service?

    Many thanks!

  32. Hello, I think your blog might be having browser compatibility issues.
    When I look at your website in Firefox, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it
    has some overlapping. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up!
    Other then that, very good blog!

  33. I am not positive the place you are getting your information, however good topic.
    I needs to spend some time finding out much more or working out more.
    Thank you for fantastic info I used to be in search of this info
    for my mission.

  34. Hey I know this is off topic but I was wondering
    if you knew of any widgets I could add to my blog
    that automatically tweet my newest twitter updates.

    I’ve been looking for a plug-in like this for quite some time and was hoping maybe you
    would have some experience with something like this. Please let me know if you run into
    anything. I truly enjoy reading your blog
    and I look forward to your new updates.

  35. Hi would you mind sharing which blog platform you’re working with?
    I’m looking to start my own blog soon but
    I’m having a hard time deciding between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal.
    The reason I ask is because your design and style seems different then most blogs and I’m looking for something unique.

    P.S Sorry for getting off-topic but I had to ask!

  36. I do not know if it’s just me or if perhaps everyone else
    encountering problems with your website. It appears as though some of the written text within your
    content are running off the screen. Can somebody else please provide feedback
    and let me know if this is happening to them as well?
    This might be a problem with my browser because I’ve had this happen before.
    Thank you

  37. Do you mind if I quote a few of your articles as long as I provide credit and sources back to your weblog?
    My blog is in the exact same area of interest as yours
    and my users would truly benefit from some of the information you provide here.
    Please let me know if this alright with you.
    Cheers!

  38. Its like you read my mind! You seem to know
    so much about this, like you wrote the book in it or something.

    I think that you can do with a few pics to drive the message home a little bit,
    but instead of that, this is fantastic blog.
    A fantastic read. I will certainly be back.

  39. Today, I went to the beach front with my kids.

    I found a sea shell and gave it to my 4 year old daughter and said “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” She put the shell to her ear and screamed.
    There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear.

    She never wants to go back! LoL I know this is completely
    off topic but I had to tell someone!

  40. Howdy! I understand this is sort of off-topic however I had to ask.

    Does managing a well-established website like yours
    require a large amount of work? I am brand new to running a blog
    however I do write in my journal daily. I’d like to start a blog
    so I can easily share my personal experience and feelings online.
    Please let me know if you have any kind of ideas or tips for new aspiring bloggers.
    Appreciate it!

  41. Have you ever thought about adding a little bit more than just your articles?
    I mean, what you say is fundamental and everything.
    But imagine if you added some great photos or video clips to give your posts more, “pop”!
    Your content is excellent but with pics and video clips, this website could undeniably be one of the very best in its niche.
    Amazing blog!

  42. Have you ever thought about including a little bit more than just your articles?
    I mean, what you say is fundamental and all.
    Nevertheless just imagine if you added some great images
    or video clips to give your posts more, “pop”! Your content is excellent but with pics and
    videos, this site could certainly be one of the greatest in its field.

    Amazing blog!

  43. Hello there, I do believe your site could possibly be having browser
    compatibility problems. When I take a look at your web site in Safari, it looks fine
    however when opening in I.E., it has some overlapping issues.
    I simply wanted to give you a quick heads up! Apart from that, excellent site!

  44. Hmm is anyone else experiencing problems with the pictures on this blog loading?
    I’m trying to figure out if its a problem on my end or if
    it’s the blog. Any responses would be greatly appreciated.

  45. I was suggested this blog by way of my cousin. I’m not sure whether or not this post is written via him as no one else recognise such unique about my trouble.

    You’re wonderful! Thank you!

  46. I visited multiple web sites but the audio quality for audio songs existing
    at this web site is actually excellent.

  47. You really make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this topic to be actually something which I think I would
    never understand. It seems too complicated and extremely broad for
    me. I’m looking forward for your next post, I will try to get the hang of it!

  48. I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you make this
    website yourself or did you hire someone to do it for
    you? Plz answer back as I’m looking to create my own blog and would like to find out where u got this from.

    kudos

  49. Do you have a spam issue on this blog; I also am a blogger, and I was wondering your situation;
    we have developed some nice practices and we are looking
    to trade strategies with others, be sure to shoot me an email if interested.

  50. I’m really enjoying the theme/design of your site.
    Do you ever run into any browser compatibility issues?
    A number of my blog visitors have complained about my website not working correctly in Explorer but looks great in Opera.
    Do you have any advice to help fix this problem?

  51. We are a group of volunteers and starting a new scheme in our community.
    Your web site offered us with helpful information to work on. You’ve done a
    formidable task and our entire community will be grateful to you.

  52. Definitely believe that that you stated. Your favorite reason appeared to be at the internet the easiest thing to have
    in mind of. I say to you, I definitely get irked while other folks
    think about issues that they plainly do not know about.
    You controlled to hit the nail upon the top as neatly as outlined out the entire thing with no need side-effects , other folks could take a signal.
    Will likely be back to get more. Thank you

  53. great post, very informative. I ponder why the opposite experts of this sector don’t understand this.
    You must continue your writing. I am confident, you’ve a huge readers’ base already!

  54. Awesome things here. I am very happy to look your article.
    Thank you so much and I am taking a look forward to contact you.
    Will you kindly drop me a mail?

  55. Hello there! I could have sworn I’ve been to this website before but after reading
    through some of the post I realized it’s new to me. Anyhow,
    I’m definitely happy I found it and I’ll be bookmarking
    and checking back frequently!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *