By Tracey Dowdy

If you were to do a social experiment and gather a group of parents in a room, even if they share similar values or lifestyles, there’s a good chance you’ll find differences of opinion when it comes to the rules surrounding technology. That means even if you maintain a reasonable amount of control over your child’s media use at home, sooner or later your digital rules are going to collide with another parent’s.

This isn’t just a debate over the ratings of TV shows or video games. Smartphones have bypassed all that and put the Internet with all its temptations in a SpongeBob backpack.

A survey by Influence Central found the average age that a child gets his or her first cell phone is 10.3 years of age. In addition, the study found:

• 64 percent of kids have access to the Internet via their own laptop or tablet, compared to just 42 percent in 2012.
• While 85 percent accessed the Internet from a room shared with the family in 2012, that number dropped to 76 percent in 2017.
• 24 percent of kids now have “private” access to the Internet from their bedrooms (compared to 15 percent in 2012).
• 39 percent of kids got a social media account before they were 11½ years old.
• 11 percent of kids got a social media account when they were younger than 10.

So what do you do when worlds collide?

The first thing you need to do is stop and take a beat. Ask any parent and they’ll tell you the same thing – they’re doing their best and making a lot of it up as they go along, just as you are. Technology is more accessible for our kids than it ever was for us and, as it’s constantly evolving, we’re all trying to keep up. Approaching without judgement means you’ll have a clearer perspective and be better equipped to answer questions and respond to difficult situations with reason and not emotion.

While you’re at it, take the time to have a conversation. Whether it’s with the parents of your child’s bestie or your child himself, it’s important to have an open-minded conversation where you can respectfully share your position. It’s not a debate, but an opportunity to see an issue from a different perspective. If you are talking to your child, they need to understand why your rules are in place even if they don’t agree with them. If it’s with another parent, understanding their perspective goes a long way toward building bridges and creating community. Who doesn’t want more people on their team, supporting their parenting?

Don’t feel like you have to compromise but be open to what others are doing. Perhaps they have older children and have already “been there, done that” and have insight into your current situation. Maybe their child has needs you aren’t aware of and that “extra time” your child says their friend “always gets” is used for assistive technology that facilitates learning. Plus, let’s be honest, some kids are simply more mature than others. While it’s wise to follow the age restrictions set by platforms like Snapchat or Instagram, some kids aren’t ready until they’re much older. Age limits are guidelines. You know your child better than anyone – including your child himself. You need to consider your child’s personality as well. Is he/she the kind to push boundaries or are they a rule-follower? As they demonstrate maturity and build trust, start adding privileges.

Finally, reach out to other parents you respect for support and guidance. Find a parent who is active on social media and knows about different platforms and privacy settings so you can feel more confident about what to allow. Chances are, they’ve got questions too. Build a community of support and mentor one another. You’ll have empowered and educated yourself and built a stronger parenting community for your child.

Tracey Dowdy is a freelance writer based just outside Washington DC. After years working for non-profits and charities, she now freelances, edits and researches on subjects ranging from family and education to history and trends in technology. Follow Tracey on Twitter.

By Tracey Dowdy

If you’ve ever searched for IKEA furniture assembly tutorials but found yourself sucked into a YouTube vortex watching a monkey getting a haircut in a high-end salon – and really, who hasn’t? – you know how easy it is to get sidetracked.

Of course there are plenty of people who don’t get distracted. Personally, I think they’re either liars or wizards but that’s a topic for another day. For the rest of us, the gods of the Internet have created several excellent time management apps.

One of my favorites is Strict Workflow, a free Chrome plug-in that uses the Pomodoro method. The idea is that you work in 25 minute blocks, then give yourself a five-minute break. I work best with deadlines, so knowing the end is 25 minutes away, I can work more productively and get more done. Once the app is installed, the tomato icon (Pomodoro is tomato in Italian) sits idle in the corner of your browser until you click on it to set the timer. When the time is up, a bell rings and you click the icon again to set the five-minute break timer. You can disable or enable at any time by going to your browser’s Settings.

If timers aren’t your thing, consider Trello, which is To-Do list based. Just make a list of tasks or errands, set a deadline and get started. Each list you create gets its own card that can be customized with details, attachments and links to help you complete the task.  For example, create a grocery list with a link to store coupons. You can prioritize your cards by order of importance or urgency and, once the task is complete, you can drag it to a “Finished” column and pat yourself on the back. Trello works with all popular browsers and easily integrates across platforms for team projects, so it’s ideal for personal or business use.

If you’re up for a hardcore I can’t be distracted! approach, then Cold Turkey might be right up your alley. Tech Radar calls Cold Turley a “nicotine patch for social media addicts.” Determine how much time you want to work and set the timer. Unlike Trello or Strict Workflow, you can’t just turn it off by disabling it in your browser Settings and you can’t uninstall it when it’s running. Cold Turkey works with all major browsers and includes a default list of the most common time thieves like Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, but you can add your own sites to save yourself from, well, yourself.

Tracey Dowdy is a freelance writer based just outside Washington DC. After years working for non-profits and charities, she now freelances, edits and researches on subjects ranging from family and education to history and trends in technology. Follow Tracey on Twitter.

By Tracey Dowdy

There are almost as many apps for your pet as there are for your kids. Seriously, Scroll through your app store and you’ll find scores of apps for pet owners and animal lovers, but just as with the apps you choose for your children, not apps are created equal. And, if you’re looking for training or first aid advice, poor quality apps may not only be a waste of time or money, they may be dangerous. The best pet apps are developed by veterinarians and animal experts and promise useful and interesting tips, tools, and information.

Pet First Aid by American Red Cross

Just as with a medical emergency with a human, it’s best not to waste time scrolling through an app to figure out what to do – get to your vet immediately. Pet First Aid by American Red Cross is best used as a how-to reference before you find yourself in an emergency situation so you’re best prepared. The app offers comprehensive, step by step first aid information for 25 common emergencies. There’s tips on giving medication, training and behavior guides, video instruction, photos to help identify poisons, and even advice on when it may be time to say goodbye. The app is customizable so you can enter your pet’s information and track their medical history.

Platform: iOS, Android
Cost: Free

Animal Poison Control Center

The Animal Poison Control Center mobile app puts potentially life-saving information in the palm of your hand by giving you one-touch speed-dial access to the 24-hour Poison Control hotline. The app focuses on dogs, cats, horses, and birds and provides a database of information and photos to help you identify toxic and non-toxic plants, common household hazards, medications, and guideline for both warm and cold weather conditions. One of its best features is the Chocolate Wheel that lets you know what symptoms and reactions to expect based on the amount and type of chocolate invested. There’s also a “rodentslide” calculator to assess the severity and degree of poisoning based on the type of rat poison your pet consumed.

Platform: iOS, Android
Cost: Free

ASPCA

If you’re ever faced with a natural disaster, the ASPCA mobile app offers access to “critical advice on what to do with your pet before, during and after a major storm — even if there’s no data connectivity.” You can upload your pet’s photos, medical records, and vet information and get advice on what to do with your pet before, during and after a major weather event. The app includes a missing pet recovery kit, that includes step-by-step instructions on how to search for lost animals in a number of circumstances. You can even create a flyer if your pet gets lost that is easily shared on social media platforms.

Platform: iOS, Android
Cost: Free

Tracey Dowdy is a freelance writer based just outside Washington DC. After years working for non-profits and charities, she now freelances, edits and researches on subjects ranging from family and education to history and trends in technology. Follow Tracey on Twitter.