When my kids were younger I insisted on mealtimes being device free. That wasn’t as big a sacrifice as it sounds. It was back in the day when flip phones were all the rage, so phones weren’t nearly the distraction they are today.

Fast forward 10 years to where handheld devices and technology have become ubiquitous. Our screens are on the table, in our car headrests, and in the palms of our hands. From our bedrooms to the bathroom, on a plane, in the car, screens are everywhere.

Combine this with our busy schedules and you realize it’s become a real challenge for most people to sit down and connect with their families. A survey by Common Sense Media found over half the parents and caregivers polled said they were concerned about technology detracting from quality family time at dinner; 47 percent said family members had brought a device to the table and 35 percent admitted that it had resulted in an argument.

Enter the Device Free Dinner Challenge.

Recognizing that children whose family regularly share meals have better socialization skills, develop a larger vocabulary, understand more about nutrition, are less likely to act out, and are less likely to engage in substance abuse, Common Sense Media developed a program encouraging families to go device free and engage in conversation.

Looking at your weekly calendar, the prospect of carving out regular, relaxing meals may seem as likely as convincing your toddler that a bathing suit, rubber boots and a toque is not an acceptable outfit for playing in the snow. (FYI, I’ve had that conversation.)

The last thing any parent needs is another guilt trip or the suggestion that they’re falling short in yet another area of parenting. The idea is to try. Be intentional in carving out one or two nights a week to sit down as a family and connect with your kids. Play games like “Best thing/Worst thing”, “Who Am I?”, Twenty Questions, or “Would You Rather…” if you’re stuck for conversation starters. Dinner itself doesn’t need to be complex – frozen pizza or takeout counts as dinner just as much as pot roast or taco night.

Stepping away from our devices is a healthy move for all of us – mom and dad included – and modeling behavior is the surest way of demonstrating to your kids the kind of habits you want them to develop.

Tracey Dowdy is a freelance writer based just outside Washington DC. After years working for non-profits and charities, she now freelances, edits and researches on subjects ranging from family and education to history and trends in technology. Follow Tracey on Twitter.

By Tracey Dowdy

Are you guilty of “sharenting”? Don’t know what that is? Actually, you’re probably familiar with the concept, perhaps just not the term.

Last week I came across a news story of an Austrian teenager who is suing her parents for sharenting. They had been sharing her childhood photos on Facebook and despite her repeated requests for them to stop, particularly posting photos of her in the bath or having her diaper changed, they continued to post. As a result, she felt she had no recourse except to pursue legal action. That’s obviously the far end of the spectrum, but she isn’t alone in her attitude.

So, how much is too much? If they’re your children and your photos, don’t you have the right to post and share? Well, ask yourself, “Do I have the right to curate someone else’s social media presence without their consent?”

The divide seems to be generational – if you’re the parent or grandparent, the answer tends to be “Yes” but if you’re the child, the answer is almost always “No.” In fact, a 2016 study by the University of Michigan found three times as many kids as adults felt it was important for parents to have rules about what could be posted on social media.

As a parent, we want to share those funny anecdotes and charming videos and most parents aren’t looking for an audience beyond their family and friends. But, once it’s online, those photos and videos take on a life of their own.

Remember the video of 3 year-old Mateo and his negotiations for a cupcake? No? What if I said, “Linda, Linda, Linda, you’re not listening to me!” Now you remember don’t you? At the time of this post, the video has 48,620,411 views on YouTube. Mateo made it to The Ellen DeGeneres Show, received not one but an entire tower of Batman and Superman cupcakes, and Linda got a trip to a spa plus a check for $10,000. Not a bad return for three minutes of negotiations between a mom and her toddler.

You may know Laney Griner’s son Sammy as “Success Kid”. Initially, Griner was unhappy about Sammy’s photo going viral until recently when she was able to capitalize on the meme and raise $90K for her husband’s dialysis. “Without that happening, how much could I get this recognition about my husband’s kidney transplant?” she asked in an interview with ABC news.

Both those examples, despite Laney Griner’s initial displeasure, have happy endings but that’s not always the case. Aside from cyber-crimes like digital kidnapping and photos being stolen and posted to child-porn sites, kids are just flat unhappy that parents don’t consider the post from their perspective.

According to Dr. Leonard Sax, child and adolescent development expert and author of The Collapse of Parenting, “A lot of these things you think are harmless, are not actually that harmless… My first question to parents when they ask if it’s okay to post about their child is, ‘Why are you doing this?'” says Dr. Sax.

I think that’s a good rule to apply to anything we post online. Why are you posting it? Attention? Validation?

Engaging in an online community of support can be a positive thing. But those of us so mindful of curating our own digital identities would do well to offer our children the same consideration.

Tracey Dowdy is a freelance writer based just outside Washington DC. After years working for non-profits and charities, she now freelances, edits and researches on subjects ranging from family and education to history and trends in technology. Follow Tracey on Twitter.