Buying cell phones and other tech toys: How young is too young?

The Online Mom is often asked about the appropriate age for kids to start owning their own tech gadgets. Whether it's a first cell phone, a gaming console or a laptop, parents often struggle with the decision, fearing that their child is too young or they are opening up the floodgates for other must-have devices.

Most of the time, we advise that it's a personal decision, based on the parents' assessment of the child's maturity and whether they have "earned' the opportunity.

If you're wondering whether now is the time to buy that first computer or gaming console, here are a few things to consider:

Will your child use the technology?

It may great for your child to be the first in her class to own a cell phone, but if she's the only one, who is she going to call? Most cell phones purchased for kids under the age of 12 sit in a kitchen drawer gathering dust. Similarly, an expensive laptop with all the bells and whistles is a waste if all they do now is visit Club Penguin or Moshi Monsters. Wait until there is a real need.

Does your child respect expensive things?

If your tween has a habit of breaking everything he gets his hands on, then maybe it's too early for that $170 Nintendo DSi. Similarly, if you're always going to the Lost & Found, it might not be a good idea to buy him an iPod for the school bus. When it comes to gadgets, start them off at the lower end of the price range – an iPod Shuffle vs. a Nano, for example. If they can still find it a year later, then maybe it's time to move up!

Smartphones are for smart people

A smartphone is not just a phone; it's a camera, it's a GPS device, it's a gaming console, and it's a gateway to the Internet. OK, your child might not use these features and you can always lock down Internet access, but then why give them the device in the first place? Don't buy your child a smartphone until they are smart enough to use it.

Don't buy them technology you don't understand

OK – that might be a tough one. Even very young kids know their way around a keyboard and by the time they get to the tween years, they might have already passed you by on the digital superhighway. However, you don't have to be a hardcore gamer to know which video games are inappropriate and whether they should be playing online with a bunch of strangers.

Research the technology and the gadgets that they are asking for. If the devices are Internet-enabled, find out how you can control access. Lots of parents have recently purchased the iPod Touch only to find out later that it has built-in Wi-Fi and can access the Internet from almost anywhere. When it comes to video games, check out the ESRB game ratings and rating summaries.

Don't let your kids talk you into exposing them to risk!

Don't be afraid to take gadgets away

Just because you gave them a cell phone or an Xbox 360, it doesn't mean that it's theirs to use wherever and whenever they want – at least not while you're still paying the bills! Don't be afraid to take tech gadgets away if they are being misused or if rules are being broken. A friend of mine has a strict rule that no cell phones or iPod Touches are allowed on sleepovers. A perfectly sensible rule when all the kids are on sugar overload and they think it would be fun to text the new girl at school!

Monitor total screen time

A recent survey found that the average American child is still watching four hours of television a day. Add on video gaming, computer time and texting and it's surprising that they ever get up off the couch. Don't let tech time be an add-on to TV time. Carefully monitor total screen time and be firm about shutting down gaming consoles and computers when the allotted time is up.

Beware the webcam

Our tweens are growing up in a world where face-to-face means a video chat and YouTube is way more entertaining than TV. Every computer and laptop over $600 now comes with a webcam and kids know how to work a webcam before they can add fractions. Be very careful how the webcam is used, particularly as they get older. Webcams never belong in the bedroom – and that's a rule you should try and enforce until they head off to college!

Next: What's the right age to have a Facebook account or access YouTube?

Do you have a rule for buying those first tech gadgets? Share it with The Online Mom!